It seems like I spend the majority of my day navigating my kids through daily life. The do’s and don’ts of what should go in your mouth, your hair, the toilet. How to interact with strangers, friends, teachers, adults and other kids. How to and how not to interact with their world.

There’s so much that I try to input into their lives and yet, they teach me so many things. Patience, the joy of rediscovered play, how to use any winter gear as a projectile. So many things.

And as I’m digging deeper into teaching them about God, their questions and comments turn the tables and shed light on my own prayer experiences.

Some of it is funny, like how they’re working out that God is with us but we can’t see him.

Younger Sister: “Come play with me!???!!!”. 

Older Brother “I don’t want to. God will play with you”.

Younger Sister “But he’s not a kid here right now!”

And some of it gives me ideas about myself and my prayer life.

1.) Prayer ruts happen very easily

If you’ve ever tried to get your children to pray outside their standard “ThankyouGodforthiswonderfulfoodAmen” pre-meal prayer, you know what I mean. And this is true for adults as well. We can so easily get into a rut in our prayer life.

It’s like exercise. If we always pray how we’ve always prayed, we start to believe that prayer doesn’t do anything. Prayer is a growing process. If we learn from others and incorporate some of their prayer practices, we may discover new ways of interacting with God.

2.) Prayer can leave you with more questions than answers.

Children seem to be so much more comfortable with this than I am. A friend of mine who teaches and pastors children once said that teaching children some of the difficult things about God is easier than teaching adults. Children are constantly learning and encountering things they don’t understand. And they’re ok with it. It’s the adults that have the trouble.

How often have I asked God to intervene in a pressing situation or need and been frustrated because I didn’t see immediate results. My kids are much more patient in prayer than I am. They aren’t thrown off by lack of answers from God. They just shrug and figure there’s something going on that they don’t understand.

And in those hard situations where the answer wasn’t what they’d hope, they just dig in deeper and keep asking why. And they aren’t satisfied with platitudes. Sometimes I give up too easily when I should hold in tighter to God.

3.) Prayer in real life is an ongoing conversation.

When I pray with my children at night, be they toddlers or pre-teens, their brains springboard back and forth between the prayer and what’s going on around them.

Concentrated and focussed prayer times are important but so is praying continually. As I try to focus on God at various points in my day, it starts to feel like a conversation with a close companion. Times of silence, times of telling them what I see and experience, times of listening.

4.) Sometimes we tell God what we think he wants to hear rather than what we’re really feeling.

One of my sons was praying about his frustrations with his brother. As he prayed I saw him start to back pedal about what he was feeling and try to say what would sound best. I stopped him and encouraged him to let God know how he was feeling.

God wants to meet us where we are. Where our emotions, hopes and desires truly lie. And when we tell God what we think he wants to hear we deny ourselves the opportunity to experience intimacy with him that spoken and admitted truth brings.

5.) Prayers prayed in public can be used as a weapon or an encouragement.

One of the best things I can do in prayer for my children is thank God for them when we pray together. Encouraging each other through our words, through our prayers offered in the presence of and on behalf of another person is a great gift.

And nothing takes the wind out of a child’s sails than hearing disciplinary words through prayer. It takes the wind out of my sails too. Having someone recite the things wrong with me under the guise of prayer cuts deeply. Prayer on another’s behalf is intended to bring hope and healing, not despair and woundedness.

My children have shown me so much about prayer. As I look around me I see so many other relationships that teach me mindful prayer. This month I’m hoping to explore this more deeply.

Who has shown you new aspects of prayer? I can’t wait to learn from you as well!